Sometimes i fall apart...

It's funny 'cause im that girl who smiles for the camera, laughs at jokes, keeps a conversation going but at the end of the night the things i try to push to the back of my head always return. I try to put a muzzle on my thoughts, memories, and fears but they just always comes back. Have you ever had a great day but at the end of the night sat on your bed, stared at the walls while some shuffled songs come on your iPod and you end up crying the pain away? I have a lot. I think i do this at least once a week, sometimes its so funny to me because people tell me i'm strong going through the things I've been through but maybe im not? Because at the end of the night everything falls apart and i let into those feelings of depression and loneliness and just desperation to feel something more.